Helena Clayton Newsletter - View this email in your browser

Leadership Developer • Coach & Facilitator • Writer

Welcome to the February 2025 Newsletter

So we're just past Imbolc, also known as St Brigid's Day, the ancient Celtic festival to mark the start of Spring.  That might be the case, but I am still in my midwinter mood - moving slowly, taking my time and eating second and third helpings of rice pudding.

And just to reinforce the need to rest, it seems I've been gifted a hefty dose of Covid and will likely still be in bed with it when you read this.  A radical invitation to surrender!

Otherwise, it's been a momentous month, as we face into the actual and atmospheric chaos that's being created in and ripples out from the US, and I'm not yet sure what that means for us in the UK, or for me.  At the moment, perhaps like many, I am moving between scenes of people returning to Gaza and reading about federal grants being axed in the US and Insta messages about needing more magnesium, and AI images of cute donkeys.

It has also been a month of finishing some coach supervision training at the Tavistock and a wonderful day's exploration of aging and dying through the lens of systemic constellation with CSC.

This month here:
- a wonderful new podcast episode exploring love through the lens of belonging, hope and possibility, upgrading the system and bridges
- new dates for Acts of Love for Tough Times, and a hold the date for the Love Lab
- getting curious about how easily our leaders cry and why that matters
- a bit of a focus on hope, starting with something glorious from David Byrne
- a reminder to (only) do what we can - but to do it

And if this Newsletter is a Good Thing for you, then please do share it with your networks or other people who might like it too.

Until March, keep an eye out for anyone who might need something more than you and share liberally.

With love
Helena x

(pic: V+V Kniazievi)

What sustains us when we look ahead at what's coming down the line? How do we honour the pain of the world? How do we stay connected to love when things around us can feel unloving?

ACTS OF LOVE FOR TOUGH TIMES (online - and always free)

The booking link is HERE for Feb 12 1600-1800 GMT. 
and 
HERE for March 12 0800 - 1000 GMT

That's pretty much what we explore together in these (always free) monthly online sessions. We begin with a connection to what we're finding difficult, because in the wise words of James Baldwin, not everything that we face can be changed - but nothing can be changed until it is faced.  

And then in each session we take a couple of different things each time and ask 'how might this be a form of necessary love for these tough times we find ourselves in?'. For February, that's got to be hope, don't you think?  


(pic: Mariya Golub)

So a big thank you to Eloise Maxwell for bringing me together with Letesia Gibson.  That introduction led to this podcast episode, which takes in:

• how belonging, inclusion and possibility are forms of love
• why we need to dial up love in the face of politics that sow hatred, fear and division
• how the bridges between us might be short and not long
• and what each of us might do in order to be one tiny dab of mortar in a much larger wall of support 

Seriously, it's a good listen and I really hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

And more info on Letesia and her colleagues' work and how you might get to work with them is via the New Ways website. 

(pic: Eugeniu Gorean)

Nicholas Janni is always interesting to read and listen to.  His latest book is Leader as Healer and in one of his recent webinars he was talking about how important love and intimacy are for us all, and how we go to such great lengths to get it. 

He also spoke about how it's our role as leaders to be a blessing for those around us. By which he means that it's on us as leaders to do our inner work  - no matter what that takes - so that we turn up as us at our best, we show up as the most generous, warm and open hearted version of ourselves possible. Because when we do the people we're talking with and engaging with experience that as a form of blessing.  It makes their day that little bit better.  

And he's quite bold.  He also said: anyone who can't cry easily shouldn't be allowed near leadership because their heart is numb.  Never recruit a leader who doesn't cry - they're not in touch enough with their empathy and compassion.  I've quoted this to several people since hearing it and we've had some good conversations.  Try it out as a conversation starter yourself?


(pic: Hirono Isono)

HOLD THE DATE?

I'm delighted to say that I have a date for The Love Lab 2025.

Please do join me - and what I know will be another amazing group of people - where we explore together how we create connection with people we don't know.  No need to say that this capacity will be increasingly important as life offers its myriad invisible way of creating separation and disconnection between us.

We need to water the soil and make sure that the foundations for our lives incline towards togetherness, belonging and connection.  That we keep making moves towards love and intimacy. 

Come and join us?  I'm just in the process of finalising the venue, but it will be in central London somewhere. Details to be confirmed in the March Newsletter, with a link to book then too.

(pic: Jona Samuel)

I have a feeling I might keep this section in as a permanent section - something on hope in every Newsletter.  Feels about right, at the moment. 

This month then, it's this wonderful sone and performance of One Fine Day, from David Byrne and the Brooklyn Youth Chorus.  

'In these troubled times, I still can see
We can use the stars, to guide the way
It's not that far, this one fine day ...'

And if you're interested in hope in these tricky times, I imagine you already follow Rebecca Solnit?  She's based in the US but also writes for the Guardian.  Mostly on Facebook, but she's about to launch her own Newsletter any day now.  Most definitely one of the voices for our times, imo. 

(pic: Esther Miles Bergman)

'We do what we can for cats'
 

That used to be the strapline for the Cats Protection League, many years ago.  Until recently, I used to sometimes use it when working with leaders who were developing a bold and compelling vision for their organisations.  I used it as an example of something that wasn't very compelling or galvanising. I scoffed, and was a bit judgy, for sure. 

These days I love it.  I love it precisely because it doesn't talk about excellence, exceptional or ambitious growth. Of stretch goals or of becoming 72% more profitable. We do what we can, not what we are highly unlikely to be able to do, what might break us in the doing, or the trying to do.

And I also keep thinking about it in relation to the question: 'what's mine to do?' in these difficult times we're in.  Let's manage our expectations of ourselves, I think.  Let's not set targets and goals that take us past our carrying capacity.  Let's not try to do what we likely can't do. Let's aim for what we think we CAN do.

Equally though, let's make sure that we DO do the things we can.  Let's not duck the things, however seemingly small or modest, that we can do. 

I'm reminded of the words from the Talmud.  That 'you are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.'

(P.S. and yes, I do still work with leadership teams on creating compelling visions.  But firmly in the context of  making sure the people expected to make those a reality don't get harmed in the process ...)

(pic: Victoria Braithwaite)

?

in the end, that's all there is
someone to love, somewhere to live
why does anyone wake up
wanting war instead of coffee
wanting more when they have plenty
and why are they always the ones
leading the country



Hollie McNish

(pic:Ryo Takemasa)

I don't know if I've said often enough or loud enough here how much I love Niall Williams.  Time of the Child is a sort of follow-up for This Is Happiness.  And like that one, this latest took me ages to read as I needed to stop at least once on every page to reread a sentence (and sometimes out loud) because it was either so beautifully written, so poignant or so funny.  And often all three. Mind, I did insist a friend of mine read This is Happiness and she stopped part way in because she thought it was boring and definitely not funny. 

Turns out that Colm Toibin's latest, Long Island is also a follow-up, and a good 'un.  This one picks us from Brooklyn and very gently kept me in suspense all the way. 
 

I'm grateful that I didn't have to start work at warp speed when I came back to work on 13 Jan.  A relatively gentle start with: 

• A lot of coaching and coaching supervision
• lots of prep for an Exec Team 'immersion' with a colleague as we support the team in creating a solid foundation of leadership capability ahead of a big commercial growth spurt (very sadly, a piece of work that I had to pull out of, because of Covid this week)
• developing a leadership programme for an organisation in transformation  - getting the general principles in place while we also explore some organisation design work with them
• negotiating with two colleagues to pass on the project management baton on a particular joint project - which frees me up to do other things

(pic: Inge Schuster)

Do get in touch and let me know how you're finding these Newsletters, or if you'd like to see more info or anything I could include.   I love hearing from you.  You know where I am on LinkedIn, or connect via Email. Or call me of course, whichever suits.

Helena x

helena@helenaclayton.co.uk
07771 358 881

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